In Honor of Wallis and Witcher



   Commander & President
               Lett​ers

VFW POST 3031 ROGERS. AR
Commander’s Corner
As you have noticed by now, I did not get this posted on time this month. We have already had our first Steak Nite of the month and the 13 Rebel party was the same night. Both went off without a hitch and both could have used more participation. I do understand that coming and seeing a parking lot full of motorcycles that you might have some reservations about coming in and eating so I won’t say anything about our participation. Thanks to those that did come in.
Fall is now here, according to the calendar at least, so we need to be getting ready for all it brings. Halloween is this month and we will be having a party for the kids from 1-3 pm and adults starting at 7 pm on the 30th. Let’s have a good crowd. It has been too long since we have had a party for fun. Oct 31 is also the deadline for entries in Patriot Pen ands Voice of Democracy. If you have children in the appropriate ages, get them to participate.
November is the month for Veterans Day on the 11th. I plan on a Poppy Drive that day so if you can, come out and support or Relief Fund. If you have an idea of someplace you would like to go just let me know. We are always looking for ideas for new places.
Thanksgiving and Cheer Boxes are also in November. We will have donation boxes at the Post to help make these boxes. Start thinking about the people you know who might need one. Members and families are first of course but we can make some for a few others, but we do have our limits.
As you know Tuesday night the Auxiliary does hamburgers to support them and their programs through the year. I have heard complaints about the cooking and how long it takes to get served. Keep in mind that the ones that do this are VOLENTEERS and not trained or paid to do this. They are doing something that is important to the Auxiliary of their own free will because that is what it takes to maintain a viable, vibrant organization. VOLENTEER!!! You are going to eat somewhere, why not here? The same goes for breakfast and Steak Nite.
If you want to belong to an organization that supports you, support it.
Al Butler-Commander
 Survivors
One day a man decided to retire, so he booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank. He soon found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks, “Where did you come from? How did you get here?” She replies, “I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed when my cruise ship sank.” “Amazing,” he notes. “You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you.” “Oh, this thing?” explains the woman. “I made the boat out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm tree branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.” “But, where did you get the tools?” “Oh, that was no problem,” replied the woman. “On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron I used that to make tools and used the tools to make the hardware.” The guy is stunned. “Let’s row over to my place,” she says. So, after a short time rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long stone walk leading to a cabin and tree house. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, “It’s not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?” “No! No thank you,” the man blurts out, still dazed. “I can’t take another drop of coconut juice.” “It’s not coconut juice,” winks the woman. “I have a still. How would you like a Tropical Spritz?” Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces, “I’m going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There’s a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs.” No longer questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism. “This woman is amazing,” he muses. “What’s next?” When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but some small flowers on tiny vines, each strategically positioned, she smelled faintly of gardenias. She then beckons for him to sit down next to her. “Tell me,” she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, “We’ve both been out here for many months. You must have been lonely. There’s something I’m certain you feel like doing right now, something you’ve been longing for, right?” She stares into his eyes. He can’t believe what he’s hearing. “You mean…” he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes, “You’ve built a Golf Course?”
 A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back. He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying, “I regret that I cannot remember which one you are. Please keep your photo and return the others.”
 The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?” “Why?” “Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman my wife appears out of nowhere.”
Walking home after a girls' night out, two women pass a graveyard and stop to pee. The first woman has nothing to wipe with, so she uses her underwear and tosses it. Her friend, however, finds a ribbon on a wreath, so she uses that. The next day, the first woman's husband phones the second woman's husband, furious: "My wife came home last night without her panties!" "That's nothing," says the other. "Mine came back with a card stuck between her butt cheeks that said, 'From all of us at the fire station, we'll never forget you.'"
 Two married girls meet and start talking "Me & my husband are no longer together..." "Why?" "Well, could you live with a person who smokes weed, drinks, has no job and always cusses?" "No, of course I couldn't!" "Well he couldn't either!"
 A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it’s a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says,“So you’re a man, that’s interesting. I’m a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There’s nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.” The man replied, “I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!” The woman continued, “And look at this, here’s another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn’t break.” “Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.” Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens 133 it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cork back in and hands it back to the man. The man asks, “Aren’t you having any?” The woman replies, “No. I think I’ll just wait for the police.”